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Tammy Greene is a graduate of the University of La Verne. She has worked as a Child Life Specialist and social worker assisting families who have children with illness or mental disabilities. Tammy is a producer of the national PBS children’s television show, Curiosity Quest. She has a blog, Married and Naked, where she shares personal lessons learned from her own life, offering helpful ways to navigate through the challenges of marriage. Tammy is happily married to her high school sweetheart and is the mother of two. Follow her blog, MarriedandNaked, at

30 Day Marriage challenge

Over the weekend my husband was at a conference in Arizona.  I tagged along, at his urging, so that I could spend some time writing and working on my blog.  How could I deny that?

On one of the days we were there Hubby told me he really wanted me to hear this one particular speaker.  He had heard him before and loved his message.

Because of Hubby’s invite, I had the privilege to hear Eric Thomas (The Hip Hop Preacher) speak.  If you don’t know who he is, it is worth it to take a minute to Google him.  He has a great story and he has an unbelievably inspiring message.

During his speech, Eric talked about the importance of changing behaviors and how if you did something every day for 90 days it would become habit.  He expressed, personally, how he is working on changing his habits in his marriage.  He talked about how he was in the process of planting a daily seed of love in his marriage.  Every day, for 100 days, he is sending his wife a text telling her why he loves her.   And at the end of those 100 days, of planting seeds of love, he will send her a 100 roses.

I know, sweet huh?

But beyond sweet, all I could think was what if we all did that?

What if we all planted a daily seed of love in our marriage? 

Would a beautiful garden of  happiness and longevity grow?

I don’t know for sure, but here is what I do know . . . It certainly can’t hurt.

Research shows that if you want to create a new habit then you have to do the same thing every day for 21-30 days.

What if I sent my husband a text, a sticky note, an e-mail or lipstick on the mirror message everyday for 30 days? And, what if each time I sent a message I would tell him something that I loved about him?  What if I plant that daily seed of love?  Would making this daily effort in my relationship grow into a habit of planting seeds?

The Hip Hop Preacher was on to something.  Shouldn’t a marriage be created by planting seeds, watching them bloom, planting more, and so on and so on?

Makes sense to me.

So, here is the challenge I have set forth; 

A love Note a Day, 30 Day Marriage Challenge.

Starting today, and for the next 30 days,  I will send a daily text (or give a love note of some kind) to my husband telling him why I love him.  Simple as that!  But, there are a few rules I needed to enact in order to make this a successful habit.

Make sure the text or note is genuine.  I never want to give the impression that I am just sending the text so that I can finish a challenge.  I want to send it out of true feelings of  love.

~ Send the love note even if I am upset at him and there will be days where I am upset at him.  But, does the fact that he frustrates me over certain things change the fact that I love so many other things about him?  Certainly not.

~ Send the love notes without expecting anything in return.  Gestures of kindness should be done out of love, not out of the expectation that the person should do something in response.

So off I go embarking on a new challenge. I’ve never done a 30 day challenge before but I am up for it.  Can I create a habit of planting daily seeds of love in my marriage?  I’ll let you know how it goes.

How about you?  Do you want to embark on this challenge with me?